How to Overcome Your Fear of Embarrassment by Starring in Your Own Music Video

Last year, I realized that a lot of the best parts of my life were waiting on the other side of things that scared me, so I started saying yes to the world. I travelled Europe, stayed in hostels, started making jewelry, talked to more strangers, asked for help when I needed it, and pushed myself to try new things. Each time I faced these challenges, I learned that fear usually shrinks once I move toward it. Now, despite still having doubts and apprehensions in my life, I feel like a professional fear-tackler.

Today, I'm excited to share my most recent journey into an anxiety that I identified in recent months: the fear of being in the spotlight.

For a long time, I’ve had creative ideas that felt exciting in private and frightening in public. I could imagine images, scenes, moods, and performances, but the thought of letting other people see that side of me made me hesitate. It wasn’t just fear of criticism. It was fear of being visible, vulnerable, and fully myself in front of other people.

I realized that making art privately was not enough for me. What I actually wanted was to create things and let them be seen! So for this project, I used a music video as a form of exposure therapy. I chose a song, made myself the subject, and brute forced my way through the discomfort step by step: imagining, filming, editing, and finally watching myself back.

This Instructable shows how to use the process of making a DIY music video to face the fear of being seen — not by waiting to feel fearless, but by doing it while afraid.

Start with what is already around you. This project does not need expensive gear or a perfect setup, because perfection is not the point. What matters is doing what it takes to help you move toward visibility instead of away from it.

1. A song that makes you feel something
2. Phone or camera
3. Tripod, stand, or improvised support
4. Headphones or speaker
5. Notebook or notes app
6. Simple editing app or software
7. A few locations, objects, outfits, or textures around you
8. Optional: a friend to help film one or two shots

This project does not require professional gear. The point is not to create a perfect music video! The point is to use the process of making one to practice being visible:)

Start by being real with yourself about what the fear actually is. For me, the fear was being seen. I was scared of expressing too much, looking stupid, being judged, and letting people see a version of me that felt more raw and honest than I usually show.

Write this stuff down! You will be surprised at how seeing it written down makes it seem smaller than it feels in your head.

This step matters because fear gets harder to work with when it stays vague. Once I named it properly, the project made a lot more sense. I wasn’t just making a video — I was practicing visibility. I was giving myself a reason to step into the exact thing that made me uncomfortable instead of circling around it.

Pick a song that actually does something to you. Not one that seems impressive, not one you think would make the “best” video, but one that stirs up something real. I chose a song that made me feel something in my body right away — something that gave me images, movement, tension, softness, whatever. Something that felt bigger than my self-consciousness.

I scrolled through all my downloaded music and wrote down 5 songs that I visualize the strongest. Then, whether its process of elimination or a coin flip, select one.

Once I found mine, I listened to it over and over and paid attention to what came up. What parts felt intense? What parts felt exposed? What parts made me imagine movement or certain kinds of shots? I let the song build the emotional world first, before I worried about planning everything. That made the whole thing feel a lot more honest and a lot less forced.

Once I had the song, I started letting it create images in my head. I didn’t try to force a storyline or make everything make sense right away.

When you are doing this step, write everything down. This step can be as disorganized as you need to make sure nothing is missed — little scene ideas, moods, gestures, textures, random visual fragments. For me, some of them were specific, and some of them barely made sense yet, but I let them all exist.

Then I started observing and writing down what I had at my disposal to execute these ideas. I noticed mirrors, art materials, trees, hallways, glass, reflections, weird lighting, all the small things that could help me create atmospheres that reflected the initial ideas that I wrote down. That part was actually really helpful, because it reminded me that I didn’t need some crazy setup to make something expressive. A lot of the feeling was already there. I just had to notice it.

Next, look at all the loose ideas and connect them to the materials, spaces, and props that you identified from the last step. At this stage, I turned the previously scrambled, raw idea page into a short shot list — just enough to give myself direction without overcomplicating it. A few low angle shots, a couple indoor shots, some outdoor shots, and a shot from the window of my car. Nothing too intense. I wanted the plan to feel doable, because if I made it too big, I knew I’d probably psych myself out and never start.

I know this might seem like a lot of planning and writing, but when you write everything down, you give yourself clear direction. This is one of the most effective cures to procrastination in my experience.

This step really helped me bridge the gap between imagination and action. You don't need to solve the whole video in advance, you just need to get the ideas out of your head so that you can move on to the next steps with a clear mind.

This is where it got real. I had to start filming before I felt comfortable, because honestly, if I waited until I felt fully ready, I probably never would have done it. At first I felt stiff, awkward, too aware of myself, all of that. But that was kind of the point. That discomfort wasn’t a sign to stop — it was the actual thing I was trying to move through.

My best tip for this stage is to just press record.

My family member has a 360 camera, so I asked to borrow it... if you have family or friends who own a camera, ask to borrow it! If asking someone to lend something to you is nerve-racking, you have just found yourself another fear to conquer!

An iPhone camera will do just fine aswell...

Set up the camera, put yourself in the frame, and start performing.

At first my movements were small, but I wanted to be the main character of this music video, so I tried to let the song move through me.

I repeated takes, changed angles, exaggerated certain gestures, let myself be awkward, and allowed myself to feel silly. This is where you may start hearing the voices in your head discouraging you. Identifying those voices is a HUGE moment. Once you point them out, they lose their power. Keep persisting, you are now just outside of your comfort zone - amazing things happen here.

Once I got past the first layer of self-consciousness, I started noticing which moments actually had energy. Some shots felt dead right away, and some felt weirdly alive even if they weren’t perfect. Those were the moments I paid attention to. Usually the best parts were the ones that felt a little exposed, a little risky, or just more real than I expected.

This step is simply instruction to follow that instinct.

Try strange angles, lean into certain lighting, find what makes the scene hold the charge that you originally planned during the shot-list step. At this point, you may find yourself getting seriously pumped up about how the video could turn out! Focus on this excitement because often times it becomes stronger than the fear, and you can ride it all the way to the finish line!

When I got to editing, I tried really hard not to go into full self-protection mode. Don't worry about it looking perfect. Just focus on the fun of playing around with this crazy footage!

I borrowed a family member's 360 camera so I used some funny looking effects before exporting it to Final Cut.

I found that simple editing - cutting each video into a whole bunch of my favourite moments, and then messing around with the order of them made for the best turnout.

I also tried stacking the footage and using blending modes to make cool delay effects.

This editing can be done on almost any timeline video editor!

This part brought the fear back in a different way, because now I had to watch myself over and over. That can get brutal fast if you let it. So I kept reminding myself that editing wasn’t about sanding off every strange edge until the whole thing felt safe.

It's almost the exact opposite. I encourage you to lean into the strange stuff!

Watching it back was honestly one of the hardest parts. It’s one thing to imagine yourself expressing something, and it’s another thing to actually sit there and witness it. Once it was on screen, there was no distance anymore. It was real. And that brought up a lot — cringe, judgment, the urge to delete it, the urge to tell myself it was bad before anyone else had the chance to.

I had to sit with that and not instantly obey it. Some of what I was feeling might have been useful critique, sure, but some of it was just fear reacting to the fact that I had made myself visible. That distinction really mattered. Not everything that feels uncomfortable is wrong. Sometimes the fear does not fully go away, and you just have to do it afraid.

For me, this part had to be included, because otherwise the whole thing would have stayed too safe. Sharing the video was part of the exposure.

That was the final step: not waiting until I felt fearless, but sharing it while the uncertainty was still there.

you can decide whether to post it, show it to friends and family, or just keep it to yourself... either way you have just faced so many internal voices of fear trying to hold you back. If you were able to push through and create something despite the self criticism, then you have already fought half the battle.

That is the most important lesson in this Instructable: A lot of the fear of being judged comes from the voice in our own head; once that voice stops running the show, we stop being ruled by fear.